Phillipe Montalban - Cobbfather Post Gazette
As the General Managers of Cobbfather comb over their new rosters, there will be some stars, some role players, some talented rookies, and some players on their teams who make a man wonder, "WTF?" In celebration of those players, The Cobbfather Post Gazette is bringing you the studs and duds of Cobbfather World. Today we look at the cream and the crap of the American League.
AL North
Fargo Rat Bastids
Stud: SS Moises Terrero - This baller is a bona fide MVP candidate. Gifted with the glove and the stick, Moises is one tough dude.
Dud: P Thurman Evans - 5.2 million dollars of average.
Pawtucket Pouncing Penguins
Stud: CF Mendy Washington - At 10.5 million dollars, Washington is the teams best player. At 10.5 million dollars, he better prove it.
Dud: P Billy Abercrombie - With this guys control you won't see him in any modeling campaigns, in fact you will be lucky to see him make it past the 3rd inning.
Sioux Falls Great Danes
Stud: CF Sting Bailey - Bailey has the potential to put the sting on many opposing pitchers, truly a gifted CF.
Dud: CF Douglas Malone - "Look Mom, I'm getting paid 3.1 million dollars to be on the AAA team!"
New York Pride of the Yankees
Stud: SS Arthur Montgomery - Good with the glove, good at the plate, good with tips at Shula's Steak House.
Dud: P Olmedo Rodriguez - They must be paying him the 2.6 million dollars to keep him away from the team, because they certainly shouldn't be paying it to keep him on it.
AL East
Hartford Highlanders
Stud: SS Carl Watkins - Young, cheap, and good - the best kind of combo for a player.
Dud: P Lance Grace - With a stamina of 4, the Highlanders are paying roughly 480,000 dollars per pitch.
Durham Radicals
Stud: RF Justin Kennedy - With this guys hitting skills and bargain price, he is totally RADICAL!
Dud: P Butch Thompson - With this guys age and pitching skills, he is totally a BUMMER!
Chicago Old Style
Stud: 2B D.T. Hamilton - Needs to change his name to DDT, because he is a knockout.
Dud: P Rob Hall - Words cannot describe how bad this old fart is.
Trenton Barge Bandits
Stud: P Carl Sosa - We know one thing, projecting to 100 in multiple categories is NICE.
Dud: 3B Bobby Hayes - Honestly, who doesn't like having 3.2 million in the minor leagues?
AL South
Santa Fe Heat Wave
Stud: CF Gerald Durbin - CF with range and a great glove. Can handle the stick as well.
Dud: RP Scot Garcia - With a stamina of 17, and a durability of 37, at least you know he won't be in the game that much.
Monterrey Ducks
Stud: RF Stuart Paulson - Paulson can hit the ball very far, quite often. Good combo.
Dud: 3B Red Nicholson - That's 700K in red ink the Ducks would like to have off the books.
Mexico City Gringos
Stud: SS Davey Mairena - He's not a 10 million dollar man because he stinks, that's for sure.
Dud: CF Bernard Ramirez - On the bright spot, at least he might be able to coach the kids half his age.
Florida Shark Waves
Stud: CF Luke Baker - Another fine player picked up at the Stud CF Emporium.
Dud: 1B David Ozuna - For 4.2 million, you should get more in a first basemen.
AL West
Colorado Beer Bashers
Stud: P Izzy Johnson - Highest paid player on the team is also their best, with good control and great stuff vs. lefties.
Dud: SS Wilson O'Connor - Not even Coors can help this guy hit.
San Diego Spicolis
Stud: 2B Mark Murray - Can play every day, to the delight of management.
Dud: P Yannick Roberts - 4 million to watch this guy pitch is 4 million too much.
Tucson Thunder
Stud: C/DH Jordan Abernathy - Here is a player thanking his lucky stars for the creation of the DH.
Dud: P Monte Martin - Another player from Washed Up Pitcher Warehouse.
St. Louis Wiffle Ball Kings
Stud: SS Joel Clayton - This guy can hit more than a wiffle ball, that's for damn sure.
Dud: LF Patsy Lowell - Living up to his name, Patsy is teaching the kids to bunt in AAA.