Thursday, January 6, 2011

Decade of Dominance

Cobbfather has officially put ten seasons under it's belt, and has seen its fair share of glory, heartache, drama, and ineptitude.  From the wild days of the first two seasons to the relatively tame days of season ten, the Post Gazette looks back on the history of Cobbfather.

Who is the Most Dominant?

First up is a look at each franchise in a nutshell, ranking the most dominant teams from top to bottom.  There are two clear dynasties, with the rest of the league struggling to catch up.

Rank Franchise Score Owners Div. Titles WS Titles
1 Houston Space Cowboys 219.5 1 8 3
2 Atlanta Expos 188.5 4 9 2
3 Dover Diamond Dogs 124.5 2 5 1
4 Rochester Rolling Rocks 115 1 6 1
5 New York Pride of the Yankees 108 1 7 1
6 Sacramento Fighting Cornish Hens 86.5 1 8
7 Little Rock Lewinskys 79 3 2 1
8 Jackson Rockets 77 2 6
9 Cincinnati Red Stockings 69 5 1 1
10 Honolulu Haoles 64 2

11 Richmond Rat Bastids 50.5 3 1
12 Nashville Mayhem 44 2 2
13 Kansas City Tweakers 43.5 2 4
14 New York Primetimers 39.5 2 3
15 Helena Handbasket 37.5 6 3
16 Milwaukee Bashing Dwarves 37 2 3
17 Vancouver Canadians 36.5 4 1
18 Hartford Huskies 35.5 2 1
19 Austin Rock Stars 34.5 1

20 Boston Massacre 34 1

21 Arizona Hammer'd Leprechauns 31.5 3

22 Fargo Fighters 31 6 3
23 Buffalo Bisons 31 3 1
24 Los Angeles Penguins 29 4 2
25 Syracuse Sycophants 24 2 1
26 Madison Marauders 23.5 1

27 Cheyenne Chiefs 22 2

28 Ottawa Renegades 21.5 2

29 Minnesota Modern Gentlemen 19.5 4

30 Charleston Chew 17 2

31 St. Louis Beermen 15.5 7

32 Durham Radicals 15.5 2


Original Owners

There are seven original owners still in the league, eight if you count mrploppie who left and then returned after a several season hiatus.  Here is a look at those original owners and their history within the league.

alogman1 - Boston Massacre:  The Massacre have been a hard luck franchise in Cobbfather, playing in the same division as AL superpower Atlanta.  As a result they have never had a division title despite alogman1's shrewd wheeling and dealing, including the acquisition of MVP Johnny Sherman and talented setup man Esteban Tererro from Cleveland and the hated pieo for C Jamie Summers.  A wildcard entrant to the playoffs the last three seasons, alogs time may be on the horizon.  alogman1 is also responsible for the succcessful start up of the Cobbfather Post Gazette, and this blog wouldn't be here today without the impressive contributions and dedication of the Boston owner.

domiisgod - New York Pride of the Yankees:  Few owners in the history of HBD can lay claim to having been responsible for pissing off as many owners as domiisgod.  But unlike tankers and wankers, domi walks the talk and never resorts to shady tactics, and has never backed down from his core beliefs.  Always willing to let you know how great his team is, he has the hardware to prove it, having owned the AL North since day one of Cobbfather, as well as winning the World Series in season Five.  The Pride are still going strong, although domi now has to deal with much tougher competition within the division.

FW_Kekionga - Sacramento Fighting Cornish Hens:  The commissioner of the league, FW has been responsible for guiding the league through a volatile start to a stable present.  In addition to taking the blame for allowing chump owners like korruptkings into the league, he also claims credit for all good new hires.  His baseball team isn't too shabby either, having won 8 division titles and making two world series appearances.  But he will still never live down getting swept by domi to give him his first and only championship.

rawdk - Houston Space Cowboys:  rawdk and his teams have been the definition of excellence in Cobbfather from the first day of the league.  His Florida Sharkwaves were dominant, but became even more impressive after the move to Houston.  With three world titles, numerous all stars, and plenty of boasts, rawdk and his team have become the top rival for several franchises in Cobbfather, and he wouldn't have it any other way.

rbf_4 - Austin Rock Stars:  After an early run in the first several seasons that saw his Rock Stars fall short in the ridiculously loaded AL South, rbf_4 went back to the drawing board.  Doing his best to unload aging contracts, rbf_4 has carefully reloaded the Rock Stars with new drums and guitars, including the most coveted player in all of Cobbfather, the incomparably talented James Haselman.  When Haselman makes his debut next season, rbf_4 will be back where he deserves to be, knocking heads for top honors and his first division title.

The__Kid - Madison Marauders:  His team has only once made the playoffs, but The__Kid has always been confident that he has what it takes to win, so much so that he is personally responsible for domiisgod having at least two or three seasons of free baseball due to bets gone horribly wrong.  Bets gone horribly wrong can also describe much of his talent evaluation for the early part of league history, although he finally seems to have figured out that trading your studs isn't how you build a winner.  And as such his team is now on the rise, and if it can get some pitching should be able to start winning those free seasons back.

yanks21 - Rochester Rolling Rocks:  With a very quiet first three seasons it might have seemed a good idea to think that yanks had lost his winning touch.  But that would have been quite the foolish thought as his team quickly turned into a perennial powerhouse immediately after that and the yanks21 that everyone who has ever been in another league with came to life with a vengeance and has owned the NL ever since, including a season 9 world championship.

mrploppie - Richmond Rat Bastids:  mrploppie has been known to be a true Rat Bastid since the day he left the AL North and reappeared two seasons later in the AL South, sniping pieo's old team and it's typical hoard of young ill gotten gains.  He has been riding the wave of success ever since, and the league has been glad to have him as he has been a conduit for trades of elite talent virtually every season.  But there appears to be a curse upon the franchise, for despite having such amazing talent he has yet to have any playoff success, making it past the DCS only once in six tries.


The Greatest Players in Cobbfather History

Position Name All Stars MVP's Cy Youngs
C Al Samuel 5

1B Ed Morris 6 1
2B Rafael Benitez 5 2
SS Moises Terrero 3 2
3B Hick Millwood 6

LF Buddy Poole 6 1
CF Sting Bailey 4

RF Bill Everhart 8 1
DH Jordan Abernathy 4 2
SP Carl Sosa 7
4
SP Barry Carew 4
2
SP Chris Pendleton 5
1
SP Ken Evans 3
1
SP Tony Saunders 4
1
RP Sammy Felix 5
1
RP Anthony Gordon 6



Decade of Incompetence

Everyone knows who has been the best in Cobbfather history, but not everyone is able to lay claim to being awesome.  So in recognition of this, following is the Decade of Incompetence, the worst of the worst in Cobbfather history.  

Most Overrated Player in Cobbfather History
--Pinky Matheson: Few remember but on day one of Cobbfather Pinky Matheson was projected to be a 100 overall SP, with high heat, great control and splits, and awesome pitches.  Unfortunately he could never put together a season that his skills would suggest he could have, and to this day he has only amassed two all star appearances and respectable but not great career numbers. 


Biggest Goat in Cobbfather History
--Esteban Terrero: Terrero is the RP who made the term "Pulling a Sharkwave" a reality for numerous teams.  His most famous playoff choke was in game seven of the season three world series when he blew a 3 run lead in the 8th inning for the Sacramento Fighting Cornish Hens, costing them the championship.  But he was also responsible for playoff misery for the New York Pride of the Yankees and Florida Shark Waves as well.  He's great in the regular season, just don't give him the ball when it counts.


Most Hated Owner in Cobbfather History
--pieo:  This one isn't even close.  pieo was the only owner in league history to be ejected, due to his inability to play nice with others and tanking tendencies.  At the center of virtually every controversy in the league that plagued the first two seasons, he drew the ire of pretty much any owner around at the time.
Honorable Mention: krs96 (15 win season 7, etp2021 (Releasing 6+ stud prospects in a fit then abandoning his team), korruptkings (numerous max contracts to old fogies, then leaving after one season)

Biggest Playoff Choker in Cobbfather History
--Sacramento Fighting Cornish Hens: One look at their franchise history tells you all you need to know.
Honorable Mention: Richmond Rat Bastids, Kansas City Tweakers, Atlanta Expos