Thursday, January 5, 2023

IT'S A FIRE SALE!!

  Jack Torrance - contributing reporter


The fans were enthralled by the news a few weeks back about a jersey sale the Columbus Corgis were putting on. For every three jerseys you purchased you got a free Corgi. The team was finally above .500 this season after finishing last year 2 games under, and the Corgi faithful had their wallets open and ready to back their team in what had hoped to be another playoff run in a weak division. The aging Bisons didn't look like the team who had dominate the division for over a decade, the Washington DC Nationals are back in last place, but yet nobody can seem to understand the Pittsburgh Yinzers  much less how they were in first place. What is that language by the way? Do they even know what they are saying? In some sort of weird foreshadowing, Halter jerseys were the first to sell out; quickly followed by Street's. Midway through the day it quickly became a whole different story to the Corgi faithful when news broke of Keith Halter being traded to the NOOFs for a package of prospects; a centerfielder and two pitchers. The deal confused some fans considering they still had Anibal Castillo's max contract on the books through S56 but others welcomed the change, even though the owner who only made 8 deals in the last decade and first one since Season 51. But that's when the big announcement came, the Columbus Corgis were....retooling! Those who questioned it, all thought at least retooling wasn't rebuilding; but then it came; Alan Street was being traded to the Atlanta Expos. Mayhem ensued! Jerseys were thrown Morrill Tower at THE Ohio State University and littered the roads of High Street in the Short North. The phones were busy in the owner's office and many more deals were made, sending everything the Corgis had out the door. 

All in, here is what the Corgis received:
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